5 Ways To Get Back Together After A Break
Getting back together after a break up may be exactly what you want. If you think that you both of you still truly love each other, but are worried taking a break will lead to the relationship’s ultimate demise, there are plenty of things you can do to ensure you guys get back together, even after taking a break.
Here are five ways to help you get back together:
1. Talk about what led to the breakup.
In order to progress and not repeat the same mistakes it is always necessary to look back at what went wrong and why. This reflection is very important for many reasons; you will need to grasp your ex’s frustrations and disillusions in order to establish a healthy communication platform with him or her moving forward.
If you don’t really take the time to understand his or her perspective and empathize with them to some degree, it will be very difficult to get him or her to lower their guards and to openly talk to you.
A breakup never happens without reason and subsequently bitterness, incomprehension or different desires can still exist between you and your ex.
These things need to be fixed so that you don’t have to deal with bad memories that will resurface and threaten your new relationship together.
2. Make sure to take things at a slow pace.
If you lived together, maybe don’t hand over the keys right away. Spend time with each other like you’re dating from the beginning and take time to reconnect with one another, possibly with the help of a counselor. This can be especially important if you’re dealing with a particularly painful reason for your split, like an infidelity.
Getting back together is a lengthy process and a lot of people in your life will probably be tipped off to what you’re doing. They may have their own reservations about it because they most likely were there for you when your relationship went south. If they make good points, hear them out but ultimately this is your decision to make.
3. Remember why you are doing this.
It’s going to be very hard not texting each other and not seeing each other. Maybe you will start to wonder if the other person is happier without you and forget about all the positive results that the break will have.
Think about how hard things were getting when you were together, and remember this is only going to make you a stronger person. And ultimately, it will give you a stronger relationship.
I’m sure your significant other is having just as hard of a time without you, so do not start feeling insecure and cut the break short just because you miss them. If you do, then the same problems will be there when you get back.
This is the time to take active steps to improve yourself, and you need to trust the other person is doing the same. Don’t try to figure out what they are doing, don’t drunk text them and don’t post Snapchat stories just to see if they are keeping tabs on you.
Just be secure with your decision, and go make the most of this time for yourself, whatever that means for you.
4. Take Responsibility.
It is important to be aware of why things weren’t working out. If you were feeling insecure about the relationship, there is definitely a reason for it.
Maybe you felt insecure, and as a result, you were acting needy or trying to control the other person. Maybe things got tense.
You must have a clear plan of action and not let your emotions dictate your every move. You will need to be smart patient and resilient in order to prove to your ex that he or she made a mistake and that you can make him or her happy
If you were having a hard time talking to each other about it, try talking to friends and family and getting some advice from people in relationships who may have gone through a similar situation.
If you both love each other, you know you are both good people. But the problem is, lately, you are both making some not-so-great decisions that are causing each other pain.
Put yourself in the other person’s shoes for a few moments. Think about things you could have done differently and how you could have been more sensitive during the trying times. Then, you can start to gain some poise and composure.
5. Let go of the past.
You may never be able to forget what happened in the past, but it is important to let it go. Forgiveness is important when it comes to a relationship because everyone undoubtedly makes mistakes.
When you are reminiscing about the relationship during the break, maybe you will find there were a lot of things that bothered you that trickled into other aspects of the relationship. Talk about those things, remember those things and use them to propel yourself into the relationship for a second time with a more open heart and a more easy-going, carefree attitude.
You and your partner will not be able to move forward if you keep looking backward. If you really want to get back together with this person, remember all the reasons you want to be together, and forget about the less important things.
Know that stress, doubt, jealousy and fear will always exist in our minds, but powering through the struggle, letting go and communicating where necessary will ensure you get back together stronger and happier than ever.